Sometimes you are just so happy you have to dab. I think the picture above (as the old saying goes) is worth a thousand words. Yesterday Alex's soccer team, who Bert just happens to be the Coach of won the division. For Bert this was so much more than a U12 soccer team having a good season. When Bert started coaching this group of boys it was the same time ALS came into our lives. The official diagnosis came right after the first fall season. I hope someday these boys will know just how important their role was in Bert's fight against ALS.
When you receive the diagnosis that you have ALS you feel like everything falls apart. There are so many unknowns, and in time ALS takes and takes and takes. Careers are lost, hobbies are stolen, basic tasks of daily living become impossible and it can be hard to see the light. This group of boys played the most important role in my husband wanting to get up in the morning, and most importantly keeping a smile on his face. Bert was not a soccer player, he was an All American hurdler but that did not stop him from studying and learning the game and becoming the most amazing coach in so many ways. In turn the boys gave him a purpose and responsibility.
ALS can be isolating, adults are uncomfortable with the slowly dying body, the slurred and garbled speech. Adults don't know what to say, most want to avoid rather than embrace. It's hard for adults, they do not want to face mortality. Kids...they just don't judge, they are carefree, they treat everyone the same. These soccer boys gave Bert a very important gift...the gift of being able to forget ALS.
From symptoms that were barely noticable to being confined to a wheelchair, and difficult to even understand (and the boys always knew exactly what he was saying even when none of us adults did) these boys didn't bat an eye. They pitched in, helped out, worked together and became an amazing team of not only soccer players but wondreful young men. I remember the first time Bert used his wheelchair at practice, he was so worried about what the boys would think. We showed up to the field and no one even noticed. These boys gave Bert respect, they gave him their attention, they played hard for him, and they trusted him. Not every season has been a winning one, but there was so much more going on with this team than winning soccer games. Everyone was learning not only how to play soccer, but how to push through adversity. Bert taught these boys that they can do anything, that they should not let any obstacle stand in their way. The boys taught Bert that despite ALS he was still important, he still could make a difference.
No matter what was happening in our house, equipement and feeding tubes, hospitalizations, and clinic appointments, we always went to soccer. Bert rarely cancelled a practice, he never missed a game. No matter how tired or in pain he was he prepared work outs, sent emails and showed up. Even when he spent the week in the hospital with pneumonia this fall getting discharged with a cough assist and Bipap machine to help him breathe he made me bundle him up to travel to our away soccer game. It was blistery cold and windy, he was sick and coughing, and we lost the game (we lost every game in the fall) he still would not stay home. I didn't even argue about soccer, it was not a topic up for discussion...we went rain, snow, wind or cold.
This year Bert decided it was time to retire. His body is getting tired, the boys are moving on to middle school and he is ready to sit back and relax in the stands just enjoying the game. That didn't stop him from working to find everyone a place to play so most will stay together, even in retirement he still feels responsible for these boys. Yesterday was bitter sweet, we had a winning spring season which was fitting and well deserved; this last game seemed like the perfect ending to a wonderful ride. I hope that later in their lives these boys will know just how important their role in Bert's life was and how in the midst of the worst terminal disease one could be diagnosed with they brought a out a positive in everyday.
We took pictures after the game in celebration. The boys brought Coach Bert in the pictures and decided to do the dab. In the last shot they held Bert's arms so he could dab. His smile is so genuine, he is truly happy and when you are that happy sometimes you just have to dab.
I think Bert taught everyone that "Your character is more important than how good you are at any sport. Your athleticism is only temporary, but your character, the type of person you are, lasts forever. Be humble. Be compassionate. Be grateful. Be honest and put others first. Be the Best Person You Can Be!" (author of quote unknow).
It wasn't always easy, especially for Alex. If you have ever coached your child or if you have ever had your parent as a coach it is not always fun. Alex and Bert had their own relationship on and off the field, there was lots of discussion (that's a nice word for arguing) but yesterday on the way home from that last game Alex and Bert agreed on one thing, they were both grateful that they were given this time together. I could not have agreed more. The time they spent together especially behind the scenes getting ready for practice and games was special and I am so thankful that they had the opportunity to experience it. There were times I could have screamed and times I did, but their relationship is special even if others may not understand it looking in from the outside.
I know first hand that playing sports teaches alot more than just winning, although winning is fun (and Bert wanted to win). Bert taught these boys the importance of a teamwork, the importance of working together, and most of all the importance of being truly happy for your friends when they do well. He would always say "we win as a team and we lose as a team; it's not about who put the ball in the goal, it's about everyone working together to defend the goal send the ball up the field cross it over and score!" He would bench you if you didn't pass the ball. It is not always easy to teach that lesson to growing boys who all want to be MVP. To Bert everyone was most valuable because as he would say "you can't win a soccer game by yourself."
I heard a quote not long ago that I found very fitting to describe our team, I am not sure who said it but it's us: "Coming together is a beginning. Keeping together is progress. Working together is success." This is true for Bert's soccer team and true when confronting any bump in the road of life. You cannot do it alone.
A heartfelt thank you to the soccer boys and of course your parents who sacrificed more than most parents do for a travel soccer team; and thank you to Panthers Soccer Club. It's been a pleasure to have a front row seat to this amazing team. Congrats on your win. I am super proud of you all.
xoxo~ Jennifer
*note in case you haven't heard of the dab-it's a dance move that athletes like football player Cam Newton strated using to celebrate touchdowns and wins in sports see pic for demonstration :)
When you receive the diagnosis that you have ALS you feel like everything falls apart. There are so many unknowns, and in time ALS takes and takes and takes. Careers are lost, hobbies are stolen, basic tasks of daily living become impossible and it can be hard to see the light. This group of boys played the most important role in my husband wanting to get up in the morning, and most importantly keeping a smile on his face. Bert was not a soccer player, he was an All American hurdler but that did not stop him from studying and learning the game and becoming the most amazing coach in so many ways. In turn the boys gave him a purpose and responsibility.
ALS can be isolating, adults are uncomfortable with the slowly dying body, the slurred and garbled speech. Adults don't know what to say, most want to avoid rather than embrace. It's hard for adults, they do not want to face mortality. Kids...they just don't judge, they are carefree, they treat everyone the same. These soccer boys gave Bert a very important gift...the gift of being able to forget ALS.
From symptoms that were barely noticable to being confined to a wheelchair, and difficult to even understand (and the boys always knew exactly what he was saying even when none of us adults did) these boys didn't bat an eye. They pitched in, helped out, worked together and became an amazing team of not only soccer players but wondreful young men. I remember the first time Bert used his wheelchair at practice, he was so worried about what the boys would think. We showed up to the field and no one even noticed. These boys gave Bert respect, they gave him their attention, they played hard for him, and they trusted him. Not every season has been a winning one, but there was so much more going on with this team than winning soccer games. Everyone was learning not only how to play soccer, but how to push through adversity. Bert taught these boys that they can do anything, that they should not let any obstacle stand in their way. The boys taught Bert that despite ALS he was still important, he still could make a difference.
No matter what was happening in our house, equipement and feeding tubes, hospitalizations, and clinic appointments, we always went to soccer. Bert rarely cancelled a practice, he never missed a game. No matter how tired or in pain he was he prepared work outs, sent emails and showed up. Even when he spent the week in the hospital with pneumonia this fall getting discharged with a cough assist and Bipap machine to help him breathe he made me bundle him up to travel to our away soccer game. It was blistery cold and windy, he was sick and coughing, and we lost the game (we lost every game in the fall) he still would not stay home. I didn't even argue about soccer, it was not a topic up for discussion...we went rain, snow, wind or cold.
This year Bert decided it was time to retire. His body is getting tired, the boys are moving on to middle school and he is ready to sit back and relax in the stands just enjoying the game. That didn't stop him from working to find everyone a place to play so most will stay together, even in retirement he still feels responsible for these boys. Yesterday was bitter sweet, we had a winning spring season which was fitting and well deserved; this last game seemed like the perfect ending to a wonderful ride. I hope that later in their lives these boys will know just how important their role in Bert's life was and how in the midst of the worst terminal disease one could be diagnosed with they brought a out a positive in everyday.
We took pictures after the game in celebration. The boys brought Coach Bert in the pictures and decided to do the dab. In the last shot they held Bert's arms so he could dab. His smile is so genuine, he is truly happy and when you are that happy sometimes you just have to dab.
I think Bert taught everyone that "Your character is more important than how good you are at any sport. Your athleticism is only temporary, but your character, the type of person you are, lasts forever. Be humble. Be compassionate. Be grateful. Be honest and put others first. Be the Best Person You Can Be!" (author of quote unknow).
It wasn't always easy, especially for Alex. If you have ever coached your child or if you have ever had your parent as a coach it is not always fun. Alex and Bert had their own relationship on and off the field, there was lots of discussion (that's a nice word for arguing) but yesterday on the way home from that last game Alex and Bert agreed on one thing, they were both grateful that they were given this time together. I could not have agreed more. The time they spent together especially behind the scenes getting ready for practice and games was special and I am so thankful that they had the opportunity to experience it. There were times I could have screamed and times I did, but their relationship is special even if others may not understand it looking in from the outside.
I know first hand that playing sports teaches alot more than just winning, although winning is fun (and Bert wanted to win). Bert taught these boys the importance of a teamwork, the importance of working together, and most of all the importance of being truly happy for your friends when they do well. He would always say "we win as a team and we lose as a team; it's not about who put the ball in the goal, it's about everyone working together to defend the goal send the ball up the field cross it over and score!" He would bench you if you didn't pass the ball. It is not always easy to teach that lesson to growing boys who all want to be MVP. To Bert everyone was most valuable because as he would say "you can't win a soccer game by yourself."
I heard a quote not long ago that I found very fitting to describe our team, I am not sure who said it but it's us: "Coming together is a beginning. Keeping together is progress. Working together is success." This is true for Bert's soccer team and true when confronting any bump in the road of life. You cannot do it alone.
A heartfelt thank you to the soccer boys and of course your parents who sacrificed more than most parents do for a travel soccer team; and thank you to Panthers Soccer Club. It's been a pleasure to have a front row seat to this amazing team. Congrats on your win. I am super proud of you all.
xoxo~ Jennifer
*note in case you haven't heard of the dab-it's a dance move that athletes like football player Cam Newton strated using to celebrate touchdowns and wins in sports see pic for demonstration :)
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