Sports teach you to winnow...I like that word winnow, it really is used to describe separating chaff from grain by fanning or letting the wind blow it; but I think it is fitting for people and separating the desirable and undesirable elements in ourselves. I think sports allows one to find the desirable in themselves and in others for that matter.
Sport is really any form of competitive physical activity which through participation sets a goal of using a skill and improving upon it typically through a competition with an opponent. I personally have played sports, really forever, Bert has also played sports most of his life. We both agree that sport has helped us grow and essentially become who we are today. In the past if you would have asked me what counted as a sport I would have probably told you it had to be something athletic in the sense that you had better be sweating and your heart rate high for it to count. Over the years I have changed my outlook on sport and broadened my own definition to include just about anything in life that you have set a goal to accomplish and that you are trying your very best to achieve.
I was or am a runner, used to be a pretty good sprinter and hurdler, but over time I began to realize that I applied sport to everything I did. When I was in school becoming a nurse, I wanted to do my best and get the best grades, raising my children I wanted to do my best and help them become the best people they can be, in my career when I became a nurse I wanted to take care of people and give the very best care, when I moved into an administrative position I wanted to teach people and run a facility that gives the very best care that we can. I approach almost everything in life like I do sport. Bert, also was a runner, that is the one thing ALS has really taken from him...he cannot run anymore. We are both sad about that, it was something that we always had together, but we are not sad enough to dwell on it that's for sure. Bert is talented in so many sports, Tang Soo Do, road riding, mountain biking, adventure racing, and really just about anything he has ever tried. We always played together, running, hiking and backpacking in the Catskill Mountains, we always had a goal to achieve. Even when I had babies and he was playing with his friends we were still constantly talking about sport and what his next goal was and I was his cheerleader and sometimes his crew. When he couldn't run anymore we just found other things to do, in the beginning he would ride his road bike by himself and I would nervously watch him on an app on my phone to see where he was, I helped him get on his bike and then waited anxiously for him to come back in one piece so I could basically catch him and help him get off of the bike. I remember the day he stopped trail riding, it is so clear in my mind, I was driving home from work and Bert called me, he could not lift his bike to get it on the roof of his car and clamp it into the rack. I stayed calm on the phone, actually I already knew in my heart he had ALS at that time, but I still wasn't past having periods of panic when these kind of things happened and he wasn't officially diagnosed yet. I remember calling my mom to come over because Alex was patiently waiting to go with his dad to ride. He did not understand why they had not left yet when I pulled in the driveway from work. Bert and I were both in a panic that evening, my mom took Alex with her to get dinner and I think Sophia may have been at her friends house. Bert and I cried and held each other trying to calm ourselves and tell ourselves just because he couldn't lift that bike didn't mean for sure he had ALS...but we both knew. Mountain biking and running were no longer sports he could manage safely. He had already stopped karate back in February of 2013 because he could not kick or jump and his balance was not safe...he could not keep up in a class and we had not told anyone except my parents about what was happening. We still found sport though, it was through walks in the neighborhood, the goal practice compensating for being off balance and going up and down hills. Many times this goal was achieved and we both felt good, we talked a lot and enjoyed many summer nights doing our sport in our neighborhood with a goal set to be achieved. Eventually when the diagnosis finally came we decided maybe it would be good to tell his karate instructor and possibly even go back...why couldn't it be modified. I admire Bert for his courage to modify and push on, to be able to take what he cannot do and change it into something he can. That is the kind of man he is, one who never gives up, always finds a way to adapt and has a positive attitude while doing so. I am not saying he is never sad, but he has a wonderful ability to mourn what is lost and then move one to what he is able to do and be happy and grateful.
Bert practiced Tang Soo Do when he was little and then came back to it many years later when we moved to York. He liked the discipline and was competitive. I even tried it for a while with him because I was always helping him at home anyway...but it wasn't really who I am so I went back to spectating. I love inspiring quotes if you couldn't already tell...I would always look up Bruce Lee stuff and send it to Bert. Now, I know Bruce Lee didn't do Tang Soo Do, but he did some kind of martial arts and his life intrigued me. I watched the movie Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story and I thought he was interesting. He had a theory "Be Like Water" he said in every situation, in fighting or in everyday life, is varied. To obtain victory, one must not be rigid, but to be fluid and able to adapt to any situation. Like water. Bruce Lee said "empty your mind, be formless, shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it into a teapot it becomes the teapot. That water can flow, or it can crash. Be water my friend." The theory: a person must be able to function in any scenario you are thrown into and react accordingly. Lee said one should know when to speed up or slow down, when to expand and when to contract, when to flow and when to crash. It is the awareness that both life and fighting can be shapeless and changing that allows one to adapt. Lee was talking about fighting and believe me so am I, the fight that I am talking about is ALS.
We spend most weekends with sport. This weekend was with basketball. This sport is new to our family, as no one really ever played before this year. Alex wanted to try so we were behind him and it turned out really good. His team was in the playoffs this weekend, they lost their first game and were out. Bert and I were proud of him though, he wanted to try something new and he did, he learned and he played hard and had a great season. We had fun going to his games and cheering him on, it was nice to see him grow in a new sport. The team they lost to in the playoff game was a team full of other friends that he played soccer with, Alex was bummed about his teams loss, but he wanted the team who beat them to do well the next day in the championship game. Today I found out the team that his friends were on got 2nd in the championship game, they got a trophy and a medal, I told Alex and he was genuinely happy, his response was "that's so cool, I am so happy they did so good". Bert and I looked at each other and were happy too, because that is what sport does, it winnows so that ones desirable self is present.
It doesn't matter if you are athletic or if you knit or play chess, if you walk or run, ski or golf, sport allows a person to set a goal, Bruce Lee also said that "every goal is not always meant to be reached it often serves simply as something to aim at". Bert goes to karate once a week, he doesn't practice Tang Soo Do the way he did before, his goals are somewhat revised, but he aims for them regardless. He cannot bike outside any longer, but he has an awesome bike trainer in the basement that a wonderful friend got him through a generous company called tri-sports, the kids or I help him onto the trainer and he rides...not the same as before and with revised goals but he still aims. ALS may paralyze, it may take away speech and the ability to eat, but it can't take sport, for it leaves the mind and as long as the mind is working one can be like water, one can adapt, and one can still set goals to aim for...I feel privileged as I am sure many caregivers do to be able to help with the adaptation and setting, aiming, and achieving of goals that people with ALS make. You can find many stories of people living with ALS who set, aim, and achieve goals everyday with the help of their caregivers and people who love them. It's really just sport and it takes team work to set, aim, and achieve goals.
"Don't pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one."
--Bruce Lee
xoxo Jennifer
Sport is really any form of competitive physical activity which through participation sets a goal of using a skill and improving upon it typically through a competition with an opponent. I personally have played sports, really forever, Bert has also played sports most of his life. We both agree that sport has helped us grow and essentially become who we are today. In the past if you would have asked me what counted as a sport I would have probably told you it had to be something athletic in the sense that you had better be sweating and your heart rate high for it to count. Over the years I have changed my outlook on sport and broadened my own definition to include just about anything in life that you have set a goal to accomplish and that you are trying your very best to achieve.
I was or am a runner, used to be a pretty good sprinter and hurdler, but over time I began to realize that I applied sport to everything I did. When I was in school becoming a nurse, I wanted to do my best and get the best grades, raising my children I wanted to do my best and help them become the best people they can be, in my career when I became a nurse I wanted to take care of people and give the very best care, when I moved into an administrative position I wanted to teach people and run a facility that gives the very best care that we can. I approach almost everything in life like I do sport. Bert, also was a runner, that is the one thing ALS has really taken from him...he cannot run anymore. We are both sad about that, it was something that we always had together, but we are not sad enough to dwell on it that's for sure. Bert is talented in so many sports, Tang Soo Do, road riding, mountain biking, adventure racing, and really just about anything he has ever tried. We always played together, running, hiking and backpacking in the Catskill Mountains, we always had a goal to achieve. Even when I had babies and he was playing with his friends we were still constantly talking about sport and what his next goal was and I was his cheerleader and sometimes his crew. When he couldn't run anymore we just found other things to do, in the beginning he would ride his road bike by himself and I would nervously watch him on an app on my phone to see where he was, I helped him get on his bike and then waited anxiously for him to come back in one piece so I could basically catch him and help him get off of the bike. I remember the day he stopped trail riding, it is so clear in my mind, I was driving home from work and Bert called me, he could not lift his bike to get it on the roof of his car and clamp it into the rack. I stayed calm on the phone, actually I already knew in my heart he had ALS at that time, but I still wasn't past having periods of panic when these kind of things happened and he wasn't officially diagnosed yet. I remember calling my mom to come over because Alex was patiently waiting to go with his dad to ride. He did not understand why they had not left yet when I pulled in the driveway from work. Bert and I were both in a panic that evening, my mom took Alex with her to get dinner and I think Sophia may have been at her friends house. Bert and I cried and held each other trying to calm ourselves and tell ourselves just because he couldn't lift that bike didn't mean for sure he had ALS...but we both knew. Mountain biking and running were no longer sports he could manage safely. He had already stopped karate back in February of 2013 because he could not kick or jump and his balance was not safe...he could not keep up in a class and we had not told anyone except my parents about what was happening. We still found sport though, it was through walks in the neighborhood, the goal practice compensating for being off balance and going up and down hills. Many times this goal was achieved and we both felt good, we talked a lot and enjoyed many summer nights doing our sport in our neighborhood with a goal set to be achieved. Eventually when the diagnosis finally came we decided maybe it would be good to tell his karate instructor and possibly even go back...why couldn't it be modified. I admire Bert for his courage to modify and push on, to be able to take what he cannot do and change it into something he can. That is the kind of man he is, one who never gives up, always finds a way to adapt and has a positive attitude while doing so. I am not saying he is never sad, but he has a wonderful ability to mourn what is lost and then move one to what he is able to do and be happy and grateful.
Bert practiced Tang Soo Do when he was little and then came back to it many years later when we moved to York. He liked the discipline and was competitive. I even tried it for a while with him because I was always helping him at home anyway...but it wasn't really who I am so I went back to spectating. I love inspiring quotes if you couldn't already tell...I would always look up Bruce Lee stuff and send it to Bert. Now, I know Bruce Lee didn't do Tang Soo Do, but he did some kind of martial arts and his life intrigued me. I watched the movie Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story and I thought he was interesting. He had a theory "Be Like Water" he said in every situation, in fighting or in everyday life, is varied. To obtain victory, one must not be rigid, but to be fluid and able to adapt to any situation. Like water. Bruce Lee said "empty your mind, be formless, shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it into a teapot it becomes the teapot. That water can flow, or it can crash. Be water my friend." The theory: a person must be able to function in any scenario you are thrown into and react accordingly. Lee said one should know when to speed up or slow down, when to expand and when to contract, when to flow and when to crash. It is the awareness that both life and fighting can be shapeless and changing that allows one to adapt. Lee was talking about fighting and believe me so am I, the fight that I am talking about is ALS.
We spend most weekends with sport. This weekend was with basketball. This sport is new to our family, as no one really ever played before this year. Alex wanted to try so we were behind him and it turned out really good. His team was in the playoffs this weekend, they lost their first game and were out. Bert and I were proud of him though, he wanted to try something new and he did, he learned and he played hard and had a great season. We had fun going to his games and cheering him on, it was nice to see him grow in a new sport. The team they lost to in the playoff game was a team full of other friends that he played soccer with, Alex was bummed about his teams loss, but he wanted the team who beat them to do well the next day in the championship game. Today I found out the team that his friends were on got 2nd in the championship game, they got a trophy and a medal, I told Alex and he was genuinely happy, his response was "that's so cool, I am so happy they did so good". Bert and I looked at each other and were happy too, because that is what sport does, it winnows so that ones desirable self is present.
It doesn't matter if you are athletic or if you knit or play chess, if you walk or run, ski or golf, sport allows a person to set a goal, Bruce Lee also said that "every goal is not always meant to be reached it often serves simply as something to aim at". Bert goes to karate once a week, he doesn't practice Tang Soo Do the way he did before, his goals are somewhat revised, but he aims for them regardless. He cannot bike outside any longer, but he has an awesome bike trainer in the basement that a wonderful friend got him through a generous company called tri-sports, the kids or I help him onto the trainer and he rides...not the same as before and with revised goals but he still aims. ALS may paralyze, it may take away speech and the ability to eat, but it can't take sport, for it leaves the mind and as long as the mind is working one can be like water, one can adapt, and one can still set goals to aim for...I feel privileged as I am sure many caregivers do to be able to help with the adaptation and setting, aiming, and achieving of goals that people with ALS make. You can find many stories of people living with ALS who set, aim, and achieve goals everyday with the help of their caregivers and people who love them. It's really just sport and it takes team work to set, aim, and achieve goals.
"Don't pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one."
--Bruce Lee
xoxo Jennifer
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